It is all a matter of perspective. I can dwell in frustration that I'm not reaching my goal more quickly, or I can choose to notice what is happening in this moment and enjoy the fullness of it. I'm trying to lose weight. Sure, I'd love the pounds to come off more quickly. But I've been making steady and pretty consistent progress, and I've loved the interactions with my trainer and fellow exercisers at my three-times-a-week program. I have a vision of what I'd like my rabbinate to look like. Perhaps it will always be a work in progress (I should probably worry if I should delude myself that I've 'arrived'), but focusing on each shift, development, 'aha!' moment shared with our team of leaders... creates and energy and excitement and new possibility.
Perhaps you know people (or perhaps you are someone) who are/is working incredibly hard at something that you intensely dislike. Perhaps it is wearing you down. But you've told yourself that you have to keep doing it until you've earned enough to not worry about what comes next. And there's something practical and pragmatic about that. Sometimes that is what we need to do for a while. But sometimes we box ourselves in. If we changed some of our other goals, or expectations about what we really need, we might access a deeper kind of joy today instead of waiting until some of the best years of our lives have passed by. If we focused on each step of the dance, rather than a destination that we've constructed in our own imaginations, what might we discover about ourselves, about others, and about our world?
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